Odi et amo...*

This is the first post of my second brainchild blog, dedicated to my cat, Yuri - an 18-month old neutered Russian Blue we adopted from the pound 4 months ago.  He was found as a stray just before Christmas 2009, so we don't know a lot about his history.  If he were a scale, where on one side all of his positive traits were stacked and on the other side all of his negative traits were stacked - he'd come out about even.  I must admit that my relationship with Yuri (a.k.a. just plain "Kitty" when my husband & I talk to/about him at home) has changed immensely since I was laid off and have had to spend a LOT of time at home... with just him and me. All day. Just the two of us.

Let me start out by explaining how it came about that we (my then husband of just under a year and I) decided to get a pet.  Personally, I've always considered myself a dog person.  Although I've probably been an owner (or part-owner) of more cats than dogs in my life, I've had dogs for longer periods of time - most notably the two Jindo dogs I grew up with from 1988 to 2000.  And I loved those dogs, Licky & Annie, with much fiercer attachment than any cat I've ever owned.  My husband, on the other hand, although he too has had his fair share of both cats and dogs - seems to tend more towards cats. 

So whenever the subject of pets came up in those early months of our marriage, I'd always say how great dogs were and he'd always say how great cats were.  In the end, the conversation became solely about cats - not because my husband has more astute powers of persuasion, mind you.  But because of the simple facts that we were renting an apartment, had no yard, and - oh yeah - we weren't allowed to keep dogs.  So my husband would reminisce about his childhood family cat, Socks (incidentally my family had a cat - apparently with similar coloring - named Boots), go on and on about how cute cats were, and how easy it would be to care for a cat.  "They just do their own thing," I remember him saying on many occasions.  After several mentions, I began to get used to the idea of a cat - and since I've always prescribed to the more-the-merrier mentality - I started agreeing with my husband and finally chimed in one day, "OK, why don't we get a cat then?" 

That's when, for the first time in many years, I learned something new about my husband.  Apparently, when he thinks something's a good idea and meets resistance from me - the idea grows more attractive.  However, once I start to change my mind and finally agree with him.  Then, the idea (which was his to begin with!) becomes unattractive.  Extremely unattractive.  I'm sure there's a psychological/Freudian term for this... oh yeah, "Immaturity".
"Uhh, well maybe it's not such a good idea," was his response.  I sat there speechless.  Was this the same man who had been going on and on for weeks, even months, about how we should get a cat - how he LOVED cats - and that cats were the BEST pets??
"What do you mean, 'not a good idea'??" I challenged.
"Well, we should think this through.  I dunno..."
I almost lunged across the room to shake him, but quickly calmed myself.  Suffice to say, after much back & forth, we didn't get a cat until about 6-7 months later - on a cold morning in January, just after the new year, when I was at work and my husband called from the pet store to tell me that he'd just adopted the kitty we'd seen the weekend previous (and I'd really liked) and was getting a litter box and food before bringing him home.

So there's the whole history of why & how Yuri became part of our family.


*"Odi et amo" is Latin for "I hate and I love," and refers to a poem by Catullus to his lover, Lesbia (no jokes, please).  Many believe it refers to how passion in its most extreme form can so easily translate between the two emotions of love & hate - and this ambivalence becomes like a madness.